Toasters are cool and all, but they are also kind of one-note. They toast bread. Sometimes they toast bagels. Maybe they toast an English Muffins every once in a while, or you jury-rig yours so it'll make a decent, if smushed, grilled cheese sandwich. These are all worthy goals for a toaster. But what if your toaster could be so, so much more? What if your toaster could not only bring the surface of your preferred carbohydrate of choice to a perfect golden-brown crustiness, but also prepare your egg at the same time? Reader, dream no more. The day of the multi-functional toaster is here at last, thanks to yet another breakfast machine.
Deep in the weird recesses of Amazon in the toasting section, a place I venture on an oddly frequent basis, you will find a true wonder of the toasting world. It is the West Bend Egg and Muffin Toaster. Don't let the name fool you—for though, yes, it is pictured with an English Muffin, it is only your mind that limits your carb choice. Bread? Yes. Croissant? I don't see why not. But that's not even the exciting part. The part of this toaster that is unique is an attached that allows you to "scramble, poach, or boil eggs" at the very same time using the very same device. I know.
The poaching is admittedly "steam poaching" which I think is probably mostly steaming, but still. You can hard or soft boil up to four eggs at the same time! That's the full components of an egg sandwich pretty much ready to go. There's also a "meat tray" if you want to warm up already cooked meat, which, why not. The toaster advertises "high toast lift for easy removal" which I didn't even think about as a thing, but absolutely is. That low toast lift! It means scraping around with a metal utensil in a toaster, which is a risky endeavor. And this toaster? It's $39.45 on Amazon, which is perfect if you need to use up that gift card your uncle clearly got you at the last minute. Toast for all.