The other morning, I was on my way to work when I looked across the subway to see a man using a granola bar to shovel yogurt in his mouth. While this was undeniably even worse than eating yogurt on the train with a spoon, I found myself unable to look away. It was kind of ingenious in its efficiency—the pinnacle of an on-the-go breakfast. It meant that he didn't have a single utensil to carry around, wash, or add to a landfill. It was basically a deconstructed yogurt parfait. I had to respect his ingenuity.
Still gagging a little but impressed, I brought this up with my coworkers as soon as I got to the office. They had never seen this either. But it got us thinking: What other completely utensil-less but still good on-the-go breakfast meals are out there? (Don't get cute and suggest grabbing an apple.) There are certainly serviceable silverware-free standbys—bagels, sandwiches, pastries—but the breakfast world is vast and utensil-less-ness needs to exist beyond carb-delivery systems. (Love you, carbs.)
So what are those interesting but utensil-less on-the-go breakfasts? Here are a few I thought of, starting of course, with the inspiration:
Yogurt and granola
All you need is your favorite yogurt in a single size container and a sturdy granola bar. Use the granola bar to stir, if need be, and scoop a bite into your mouth. Chomp off a piece of the granola bar. Repeat. (Do I need to say it? Do not eat this on the train.)
Apples and peanut butter
A classic for a reason. If you have the time, slice your apple. If you have one of those single-serving containers of Jif, lucky you. If you just have the whole jar, even luckier you. Dip and chomp.
Bacon and eggs
Use strips of bacon to scoop scrambled eggs into your face. Maybe only do this around people who love you already. Or unrepentant bacon fans. They'll understand.
Waffles and syrup
Toast the Eggo waffles I know you have in the back of your freezer because you're "a grownup now" or whatever, slice 'em up, and dip directly into syrup. A little nostalgia never hurt anyone.